I know that everyone has stress in their life. I usually handle it pretty well but lately, I’ve been hit with a lot of huge stressful situations at one time. One of the only grandparents I have left is in the hospital and from what I’m hearing, it sounds like they are giving up on life and probably won’t be with us much longer. I am going to have to move soon because the house that I currently live in is going on the market. I rent at the moment. Also, still dealing with the ex-husband over money he owes and the house we owned, and that has a contract on it, underwent an inspection and appraisal this week. I’m supposed to get my half of the equity when it sells and then I can finally be done with the ex-husband forever if I can help it.
I could deal with any one of those separately and I could even handle two but all of them?! I’m really starting to feel it. Now while the ex and the house situation is looking like it will resolve itself soon, I am so afraid something will mess it up and I’ll have to keep dealing with the ex-husband for months to come.
As for my grandparent, they have had Alzheimer’s for a long time and I’m torn, even having been in the medical field for over a decade, between hoping they get better and get to go home and hoping they will go peacefully there in the hospital. I don’t want them to suffer any more and I know that their home isn’t really the best place for them at this stage of their illness. The guilt over which way to feel is an added stress.
Moving, for any reason good or bad and for any distance long or short, is always a pain in the @$$ because no matter how close or far the new place is, everything has to go with you! I just moved about 6 months ago and here I go having to move again. I’m good at packing and I like to do stuff like that myself but it does feel a little overwhelming right now with everything I have to do.
So why am I writing about all this here? Well for one thing, it is somewhat therapeutic to get it all out. But also because I think overall I might be handling it pretty good considering. Everything in my life that I go through makes me stronger and I see it. Do I believe that ‘everything happens for a reason’. No I don’t. Sometimes it just is. Sometimes it’s life. Sometimes it’s other people causing us issues because of their decisions or actions. I am actually able to sleep and go to work and while it is messing with my WW goals at the moment, I’m not doing as bad as I have in the past when faced with majorly stressful situations. And I’m definitely going to give myself credit for that. I am trying to maintain a positive attitude instead of a ‘woe is me’ one. I’m trying to remember that stuff happens. I’m trying to take deep breaths and a couple of minutes of quiet when I can to center myself and find peace before dealing with the next hurdle. Because I know I can.